Athletic Directors: How to Handle ‘Energy Vampires’

Whether it is disruptive incidents, illogical questions or demands, constant meetings or conversations, the need for intervention, or any number of other factors, an athletic administrator or director of a performing arts program may have to deal with these situations.

The individuals involved in these situations could be parents, teachers, coaches or even administrators, and they might be identified as misguided, problematic, high-maintenance, difficult or irritating as heck. They may take valuable time, effort and patience from athletic directors, and the label Energy Vampires can easily and accurately be applied.

Not only do athletic directors have to contend with these types of people, the incident or interaction doesn’t always occur when it is convenient in the schedule. Often, the athletic director has to push aside critical tasks and responsibilities to deal with the latest development or situation. It is important, therefore, to develop a plan or course of action.

Athletic directors first should recognize and realize that these people do exist, and they will not suddenly disappear. Every year, there will be someone, perhaps new or different, who will push an athletic director’s buttons.

Getting a handle on how to deal with these exasperating individuals is an athletic director’s only hope. The following are a few suggestions you might want to try.

• Develop a way to bring a never-ending phone conversation to a close. This can be as simple as, “I’m sorry, but I have to go now. My next appointment is standing at the door.” The caller will never know that no one is actually there, since existing technology isn’t at this point yet. And this simple statement gives you a perfect out.

• Avoid annoying, difficult individuals by walking down another hallway, thereby limiting your contact with this person. Also, if you know an irritating person’s schedule, you can also avoid trips to the main office, cafeteria, media center, or any here you might logically bump into his individual. Avoidance whenever possible is a great technique.

• Be totally prepared for those difficult conversations whether on the phone or in person. To do this, prepare a script, and have all the necessary supportive documents and materials in front of you. Also, try to keep your explanations as concise and brief as possible, and don’t allow this person to go off on a tangent. Stay on task and get your interaction with this person over with as quickly and efficiently as possible. And never, never offer, “Get back to me if you have any additional questions!”

• Let a trusted colleague – department chair, teacher or custodian – alert you that one of these vampires is looking for you. Then go hide. Seriously, take your laptop, leave your office, and go to the back of the media center, the auditorium or a storage room to work. Don’t be a sitting duck and allow this person to totally disrupt what you have to accomplish, and every hour or two move to one of the other secure locations.

• Reach out to others in the school or district and ask how they deal with this aggravating person. A colleague may be able to share a technique or approach that you haven’t thought of, and it might also work for you and be the answer.

• Intentionally set up your weekly calendar with an unscheduled, free hour and a half-time slot for Thursday afternoons. While you may not know exactly what day or what the problem will be with one of these vampires, you can bet there will be one sometime during the week. By scheduling this time on Thursday, you can move items or tasks to this time slot that had to be postponed Monday through Wednesday when dealing with this irritating, demanding person. Build the anticipated interruption into your schedule.

• Purposely return phone calls or schedule a meeting when you know that a problematic, unrealistic person is unavailable. And definitely use your Caller ID feature, and don’t answer when an irritating individual calls. Only, only return calls when you have time in your schedule and can afford to be slightly annoyed. Always connect with these individuals when it is best for you.

• Always interact with an energy vampire in a calm and polite manner. While admittedly this may not be easy, it has to be done this way. As a professional, you have no choice. Remember, you represent the school and district, and this is your responsibility.

• Take a walk after any interaction with an aggravating individual that can’t be avoided, or even for those meetings that are legitimately scheduled. Give yourself a little time to calm down and to recover. In this manner, you can be more productive once you get back to your desk. Unless you have a wooden stake available to ward off vampires, take a walk.

• Give thanks that most of the athletes, coaches, teachers, administrators and parents are fairly normal, and that you have a relatively easy time dealing with them. Reassure yourself that a confrontation with an energy vampire only occasionally occurs, and you will survive. And you might even eventually be able to laugh at the situation.

• Always end your conversation or meeting with, “Thanks for sharing your concerns. You gave me a lot to think about.” Now, this statement does not signify that you are going to do anything about the situation, you simply said, “I’ll think about it,” even if it is only for 30 seconds after the individual leaves. But this disarming comment may alleviate most of the energy vampire’s concerns and bring to a close a draining encounter.

While you can’t totally eliminate energy vampires, there will always be a few irritating, exasperating individuals in every setting. Your only hope and solution is to find ways to effectively deal with them and to lessen their negative effects on your outlook. Remember, if you can avoid an interaction, or after they hang up or leave your office, your day will get better.